Genius

I'm not ok with being ordinary.

It's a recurring fear to think that I might not have some area of genius.
I think it's one of my worst fears. To live my entire life, not being world-class in any one category.

I know I should be OK with just being God's kid. Perhaps a lot of this fear is due to a performance-based mindset.

Ordinary life sounds boring. Maybe I could grow to love it, but I'm scared when I think of being trapped in an ordinary life...

What's my problem?
Vision?
Inspiration?
Recognition?
Motivation?
Follow-through?

I want to break through and accomplish something.

This is an unfinished thought, maybe I'll add more later.
I'm posting it now because I'm not sure if I'll ever get back to it.

Isa 54:7

Yesterday while I was at home doing the dishes, God spoke to me.
“Read The Bible today, I’ve got something in there for you.”

I put it off, went outside and picked a few quarts of cherries from the tree in the back yard. Looked around online. Made some lunch.

Later I took a shower after being outside. While I’m stepping out, I hear “Isaiah 54:7”
I was a bit joyful and said “Thanks, God!”

So I looked it up right away in my NIV Study Bible and it says:
“For a brief moment I abandoned you, but with deep compassion I will bring you back.”

It’s been a bit of a rough week at times. And this one line really hit me.

Wow.. I can remember no history of the whole hearing a verse from God thing.